Then I would have quite a reputation.
ad seen at http://bit.ly/zmqlh3
And I know I have been absent from blogville for quite some time now, preoccupied with my new second job and my new semester. I’ll be back sooner or later. Just wanted to share this ad with you all! [I quite like it]
Okay, so I don’t really mean that. Anyone who reads this blog knows that I could be described as “a liberated woman” (by anyone who still uses old-timey language 
). But honestly, some newly acceptable ideas just get on my nerves.
Latest irritation: The fact that it has become so common for people to say they “aren’t looking for anything serious right now.”
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with the whole “friends with benefits” type of thing. In fact, I have been a practitioner of FWB for quite some time now. BUT I am sick and tired of hearing it- not only said to me, but to friends, to acquaintances, on TV, in movies and just about everywhere else.
Yes, it is good for people to be honest about their intentions rather than lying about wanting to date or wanting a relationship. Yes, I think it’s great that society has come to accept sexual relationships without commitment.
However, a couple years back, I feel like there were a lot more relationships and dates among young people than there are now. Also, I feel like more people actually tried to get to know each other rather than limiting their “relationship” from the beginning to one that is purely sexual.
As an example, I spoke to a very attractive man last night on POF. He is witty, hilarious, successful, handsome and put-together with strategically groomed “scruff” on his face that makes him look absolutely delicious. As an added bonus, he has the career that I hope to attain one day. His profile lists that he’s there for dating, as does mine. We chatted thoughtfully and flirted- had a great conversation. Then he started trying to get me to “invite him over.” I made a comment about finally knowing what he’s looking for on that site, and he goes into the usual, “I have a lot going on in my life right now, I’m too busy for dating or a relationship” etc etc etc etc.
Who isn’t?! MOST responsible adults- even the ones who are IN relationships- are too busy for a relationship!!
(The funny thing is though that I use that same excuse when trying to fend off those desperate but nice guys who want to date me.) But anyways,
Jesus fucking Christ[mas], what is this? It is an epidemic! I don’t know about women, but men are just overusing this.
What do you think?
P.S.
Merry Christmas! (seeing as I prob. won’t post between now and then)
Click on the images to see them larger and read this delightful “conversation” that took place on Plenty of Fish. The dialogue reads from the bottom of the first image upward, and onto the bottom of the second image. After this, he continued to try and chat with me. What the fuck?
Let me start off by saying that I find absolutely nothing wrong with the whole online dating thing, and that I actually like it most of the time. However, anyone who has tried it cannot deny that for every one diamond in the rough, there are ten cubic zirconias. Often, these duds are a source of great amusement.
I had signed up for the site Zoosk out of sheer boredom. It is one of those sites where it is very costly to actually talk to anyone- a cost that I now am 100% sure is NOT worth it. I never paid, but judging by the men that messaged me, I don’t think there are many catches on there.
One man, I think his name was Michael, somehow managed to exchange instant messenger screen names with me. After chatting for a while, he asked me, “Have you ever slept with a black man?” WOAH, WHAT? I informed him that, #1, that is absolutely none of his business, and #2, it shouldn’t matter either way. He replied saying that he cannot date a woman who has dated or slept with black men, because he finds it disgusting. I promptly informed him that I cannot date a man who is racist because I find THAT disgusting. After that incident, I pretty much abandoned Zoosk.
A few weeks ago I was at my older sister’s condo and she informed me that she was excited because she joined the site Plenty of Fish (POF). I was skeptical because I had heard that many people use that site strictly to try and hook up, so I told her and warned her to be careful. Later that night we were on her couch and she pressured me to make a profile, so I did. I figured, what’s the harm?
Within under a minute of creating the profile, I received an instant message from a user that said only, “God. I would love to lick your pussy right now.” OMG. Were my suspicions about the site true?
After a few weeks, I don’t think so. I think there are as many tactless perves as there are honest men who want to find “the one.”
Some of these nice men have the worst lines ever. Case in point, the message below.
I don’t know why it’s showing it so small, but in case you can’t read it, this casanova initiated contact with a marriage proposal. No sir, I will not marry you one day. I love how that “delete” button is conveniently placed beneath the ridiculous text.
Other interesting approaches include a man who messaged me a decent hello, so I replied. After a couple messages, he said he found an old pot buried in his backyard. I wasn’t sure to believe him or not, but I went along with it and told him that I have taken quite a few anthropology classes (which is true). He said “Oh great then you might want to come over and look at it. There’s also a bone over that needs to be inspected.” Really? A bone? WOW. Unfortunately though this guy was ridiculously handsome. **sigh**
By far , the biggest source of amusement for me on POF is that my ex boyfriend is on there. He had told me in conversation that he had made a profile, and I shared with him that both my sister and I had too. I never expected though, to actually see the ridiculousness that is his profile. First, my reaction was embarrassment for him. Next, I felt embarrassment for myself because I actually dated him. His photo has him wearing large sunglasses, braided pigtails (he has long wavy hair) and a kissy face. WHAT THE HELL. Then, my eyes darted to his screen name, which is a combination of the words “sexy cool lover.” But, in true online form, they are spelled “creatively.” >>insert eye roll<< Gross. Sexy cool lover? What is wrong with him? Not to mention the fact that his “About Me” section is a damn lie.
Last night, my sister informed me that he popped up in her “Matches” list. She proceeded to message him making fun of his photos.
Another source of amusement? On that website, excluding the aforementioned ex, I have seen three guys who have previously tried to date/sleep with me and one guy who I have slept with. I thought San Diego was a big city, and I thought that the internet was pretty expansive. Guess not. Small world.
As an online dater, I think that I am overdoing it. Talking to too many guys at once. I forget who is who and then confuse them. There are like six Erics. Why is Eric such a common name?! I think I need a “little black book” of sorts for this online dating thing. A simple name, physical description, career, memorable tidbit, and contact information. If I had such an organizational tool I think I could manage this better. Or, maybe I should just stop talking to so many. I just don’t want to pass up anyone worth while!
Right now, I am talking to the following:
An MMA fighter, a lab technician, an Army reservist, a special education teacher, and a hospital pharmacist.
I was excited when I “met” a guy who owned a philly cheesesteak shop. I thought, “Oh! A cheesesteak shop owner! The search is over, I have found the one.!” But, unfortunately, when we met for drinks, his personality was beyond bland. Hopefully his cheesesteaks are more seasoned than his social skills.
I think POF has the potential to be a legitimate chance at “love.” I suppose it depends on how you market yourself and how you assess people by an online profile that many put very little effort into. If anyone is interested in it though, I do suggest to try it. There’s no harm in exploring the possibilities and POF is free. But I cannot talk about online dating without mentioning the fact that safety should always be #1! Never give out addresses, workplaces, or anything of the sort. I like to believe that most people are good-hearted, but you never know.
If you try it, good luck! Happy “fishing.”
Also, for a better written and more extensive account of online dating, I suggest that you take a look at the blog mildredgoesfishing. Very amusing!
Yes, action movies often involve a hot damsel in distress, which I will admit always bug the hell out of me. But really, looking at who is usually cast as the “hero,” I can totally overlook the irritating female lead.
Stereotypically, society markets action movies toward men. Have you seen the latest Dr. Pepper soda advertisement in which the spokesman says it specifically isn’t for women? It’s set in an action film where the character says, “Hey ladies, enjoying the film? Of course you’re not! Because it’s a guy movie!” See below.
Stereotypically, a woman would want the romance or drama and the man would want the action film or the comedy. Somewhere in there the movie people came up with romantic comedies, which are supposed to meet somewhere in the middle and usually end up to be overpriced lackluster pieces of shit that aren’t great love stories and definitely aren’t very funny.
I say the stereotypes can go to hell! I have a vagina and I hate romance movies! As far as action films go, yes the acting is often uninspiring and equals the quality that one would find on a children’s TV show, but the gorgeous actors make up for it as far as I’m concerned.
I don’t usually enjoy gratuitous violence but lately I have been dismissing it and focusing more on other things, such as the testosterone pouring from the hero’s pores in the form of sweat glistening on his cut physique. YUM.
Case in point, the following films:
Jason Momoa as Conan the Barbarian (2011)
Henry Cavill in Immortals (2011)
Chris Hemsworth as Thor (2011?)
Chris Evans as Captain America (2011)
But here’s something… WHY ARE THEY MOSTLY WHITE?!
Anyways. I’m just saying, while I’m at the movies with my man of the week and he is in awe over the mind blowing special effects, I will be thinking about blowing the mind of the half naked man on screen who is demonstrating his masculinity by saving the world.
Who’s with me?
>>>P.S.
Don’t get me wrong, I do appreciate action films, but come ON. The only reason I rented Conan was for Jason Momoa.
So, I hate Walmart. My mom has worked at Target for over ten years and I have always preferred it over Walmart. Once, a child with a mullet and food smeared across his face and hands ran straight at me in the crowded aisle of a Walmart, and I was like, fuck this place. Since then, I rarely go there of my own accord. However, my sister loves Walmart. This bitch drags me to Walmart every chance she gets!
The other day, at Walmart, she bought two pet fish for my two-year-old nephew. Big surprise, these janky Walmart fish died within an hour of her bringing them out of the store. When I arrived at her house later, the first thing she wanted to do was go back to Walmart to return the fish and get him new ones. Of course on this second attempt at fish adoption, she wanted to make sure she did everything right. I stood with my nephew sitting in the cart while my sister talked to a man who seemed to know a lot about fish care.
The entire time, I noticed a man standing behind me. My sister asked if he needed us to move, and he said no, that he just had questions and would wait for us to finish. I continued not to pay him any mind, until a few minutes later, I turn and he’s right next to me. He says, “Here, take my number…” and proceeds to recite his number to me. I said, “Wait, hold on, you didn’t even say hello to me, and you’re expecting me to take down your number?” What a weirdo. I was not havin’ that. He then tries to hit on me, and continues to try and get me to take his number, so I lied and said I was dating someone and wouldn’t call him even if I did take it.
He tried for a little while longer, I told him I commended his efforts but told him to have a good evening, and bid him farewell. He walked away in defeat and my sister, nephew and I got the fish and went about our business in the rest of the store. After about fifteen minutes the same guy walks around the corner, and before I could even start to feel awkward, guess who turns the corner behind him? HIS GIRLFRIEND. Our mouths simultaneously fell open, we stopped, turned around, and proceeded to double over in laughter.
Straight up TRIFLIN’!!!!
urbandictionary.com defines triflin’ as:
|
Consistantly lying. Always up to no good. Sneaky. Suspect. Whorish. Always scheming. Conniving.
|
[AKA guys who hit on your in Walmart lol]
We then walked by the couple a few more times, each time making it a point to stare him down. It was too funny. He had a look on his face like he was incredibly embarrassed and also hoping to God that I didn’t say anything.
So this, ladies and gentlemen, is why you will never find me picking up a man in Walmart. There is just something off about it when a man waits around for ten minutes just to talk to you and then demands that you take his number. High five to myself, because that time, my intuition was on point.
Obviously I will not be finding my soul mate on any shopping trips with my sister!!!
Okay, I know I’m super late with this “news,” but I just saw Scarlett Johansson’s sext pictures from when her phone got hacked (or stolen, I’m not sure which). I’m not going to say much about it because really, I need to go to bed. But I feel it necessary to express my great surprise that her pictures are not that attractive. She is a decently pretty lady, who men (and some women, I’m sure) swoon over, yet her picture faces here are so NOT hot. I hope she didn’t send these pics to my man Justin Timberlake when they were dating because my boo deserves better than this! (FYI, I have been in love with JT since I was like 7)
Look Scarlett, I know you are accustomed to professional hair and makeup, and nobody expects you to take nudie pics fully done up, but I’m just surprised you didn’t at least make hotter facial expressions. Additionally, in my opinion, the poses are weird too. I will say this from experience: even if the body is supposed to be the focal point of the photo, still have a pretty face- please! JUST SAYIN’! I think she should give it another go after taking some pointers from some Playboy layouts and then get her cell phone “hacked” again, just so we know she can be hot in real life too. What do you think???
On more than one occasion, while joking with a man about how good each of us are in bed, I have accidentally said the words, “If my vagina had a Yelp page, it would have rave reviews.” Classy!!!
Last night, I was with a man who said two interesting things during sex. One was a compliment, and he said “Have you ever recorded yourself? Like your facial expressions during sex? They’re beautiful, worth a million bucks.”
Later on that same night, I was enjoying the impressively lengthy and talent-filled session, when the guy leans down, kisses me, then breathlessly requests, “Rate me.”
“What? Rape you????”
“No, RATE me. Like 1 to 10.”
“No, I won’t. Stop talking.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t do that! Stop talking.”
It’s not that he wasn’t great in bed, because he was. It was just awkward, that he was simultaneously fucking me and trying to survey my opinions about his sexual aptitude.
But today, I reflected on it, and thought to myself, what if I really could just rate this guy, and every other guy I’ve been with? What if one could log on to a Yelp type site and rate their sexual partners anonymously, like we can do with restaurants and other venues? It could be kind of awesome if you have a date with someone or maybe an impending first time hook-up, and you could just go online to this site, search their name, and see how people rated them. But on the other hand, it could also be terrible and embarrassing.
I would imagine something like this:
Experience with: Women and Men
Sexual Orientation: Unsure
Height: Average
Physical Fitness: Athletic
Overall sexual performance: 4 out of 5 stars
Oral performance: 3 out of 5 stars
Attentiveness: 4 out of 5 stars
Stamina: 4 out of 5 stars
Size: Above Average
Surprise fetishes: feet, Asians
MusicLuvr says: John’s oral skills were about average, but he really makes up with the way he screws!
BillyBoy says: He never called me back! Asshole!
Tanisha2011 says: He was great in bed, but then asked me if he could lick my toes and when I declined, he asked me if I had any Asian friends for a threesome. I definitely didn’t call him back!
BootyBabe says: Best hook-up in San Diego!
Anonymous says: Uuhhh… I came on here looking for restaurants and found this shit. Wtf?
Haaaahahahaha! It would be so funny. What would my ratings be like? Would we rather know about someone’s sexual abilities ahead of time, or be surprised? Would the site accidentally turn into an avenue for hooking up, or would people stick with rating others like we rate any other service or establishment? The way I see it, if we can background check people, review and consult reviews for everything from florists to restaurants, why not reviews on sex?
Just an idea. Earlier I thought, hey, people start websites all the time! Why don’t I start this! Then I told myself, no. Just, no. But I will say, that if someone starts up a site like this someday and makes money off of it, I will be pissed that I never did it.
Well readers, my recent subject of celibacy reminded me that last semester I interviewed and wrote a lengthy feature on a particular celebrity who is saucy AND (at the time of the interview) celibate. Interesting combination. Of course, as the blog title says, I am talking about Kandi Burruss. Kandi is an amazing woman who came to fame in the singing group Xscape in the 90′s and since has written countless hits for other artists, released multiple solo albums, and appears on Bravo TV’s hit series, “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.” Keep in mind that this was written in May, and some info on her projects has now changed.
Kandi Land
Her name is Kandi, but don’t expect her to sugar coat anything. This entrepreneur has caught her most recent wave of fame as a cast member on Bravo’s “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” and though she’s no housewife, Kandi Burruss is inarguably real. She says what she means, means what she says, but swears that she usually thinks before she speaks. In a recent phone interview, Kandi paused after every question, but let her following answers flow freely amongst occasional laughs. Her “realness,” openness, and down to earth personality have led Kandi to become a fan favorite and have helped her achieve successes in music, business, television, and web media. The ambitious mother of one keeps it real while working hard to keep things sweet in Kandi land.
Success began early for the quirky songstress when she did a month long audition for Tri-City High School, a performing arts school in Atlanta. The audition included group performances of songs from “Grease,” and after seeing an audition performance, Kandi’s older brother remarked, “You got what it takes to make it in the big time, kid.” From then on, Kandi took music seriously despite discouragement from teachers who she recalls asking her, “What kind of real job do you want?”
It didn’t take long for Kandi to prove her teachers wrong, and in 1990 she formed the group Xscape with fellow classmates Tameka “Tiny” Cottle, Tamika Scott, and LaTocha Scott. The group was quickly signed to famed producer Jermaine Dupri’s label, So So Def, and became wildly popular throughout the ‘90s.
The group split up in 2002 and Kandi doesn’t hesitate to talk about it. In an interview with “Shade 45,” she addresses accusations by a group member about her relations with Jermaine Dupri being the cause of Xscape’s breakup. Kandi puts on an exaggeratedly nasal voice and impersonates the gossiping ex-group member as saying, “What really happened was, he was screwing Kandi!” In the spirit of keeping it real, Kandi says, “Yeah, we crossed the line of friendship, let’s say that, but that had nothing to do with why the group broke up.”
After the breakup, Kandi wasted no time in making a name for herself as Kandi Burruss, and not just Kandi from Xscape. The more mature Kandi had already begun writing hit songs for other artists. Kandi wrote or co-wrote songs that made stars out of new artists, like P!nk’s “There You Go,” and Destiny’s Child’s “Bills, Bills, Bills.” This talented songwriter has also made history as the first African American woman to win the ASCAP Songwriter of the Year Award, and as the first woman to win the ASCAP Rhythm and Soul Music Award. Kandi identifies song writing as her favorite career move so far, saying that the best part is being able to still live a normal life behind the scenes while still making money.
That behind the scenes anonymity is a source of amusement for Kandi Burruss. The successes bring her joy and money, while the failures bring her laughs. Kandi warmly states that, “It gives me a happy feeling inside to know that I’m a part of something that people love.” Though accustomed to hits, Kandi doesn’t mind when she has a few misses, as she jests, “It doesn’t matter, because people don’t know when I walk down the street that I wrote the song. It’s not like they’re going to walk up to me and say ‘Oh, that song is horrible!’” She finds humor in the failures, like Usher’s “Pop Ya Collar.” Kandi says, “They talk about it in his ‘Behind the Music’ and I laugh and laugh and laugh because they dog the song out so bad, and I co-wrote it!” It’s not often that songwriters admit to enjoying the fact that the artists take the fall for bad songs, but it’s not like Kandi to care what others think.
Kandi’s “I don’t care what people think” openness has helped her develop a successful USTREAM web show, entitled “Kandi Koated Nights.” “Kandi Koated Nights,” also known as “KKN,” is a weekly web show in which Kandi and friends talk about sex and relationships. On the show, Kandi tells personal stories and shares personal viewpoints- an aspect of her personality that at times, shocks others. Kandi says, “I’m known to just say anything and out of the blue say some ol’ crazy stuff. People are shocked, and I guess they figure that because I’m a celebrity I’m not supposed to say those types of things.” But say those things, she does, on the successful web show which delivers a late night talk show with the casual ambiance of a few friends hanging out on a couch.
The candid “KKN” addresses topics like foreplay, “freak numbers” (ratings of ones freakiness), and “meat curtains” (a certain feature of some female nether regions). The saucy viewer interactive web cast showcases the openness and humor of cast members Kandi Burruss, DJ AONE, Corey Blackwell, and Nikki Nicole Dillard. Despite the fact that the show is humorous and at times slightly chaotic, Kandi makes sure to responsibly begin every web cast with a message to viewers about safe sex.
Miss Kandi Koated shares that the popular web show, which today boasts over 500,000 views, actually started on a fluke. One night, as Kandi was online doing a promotional contest for her song “Fly Above,” one fan began posting sexually explicit comments in the chat. Kandi tolerated it goodheartedly and laughs that she told the commenter, “Look, you’re going to have to wait until midnight and then we’ll do Kandi after dark.” Come midnight, it became apparent to Kandi that fans took her joke to heart, as one commenter said “Hey, I thought we were going to do Kandi after dark!” Being open to new experiences, Kandi told fans to send her their best sex stories and they would go from there. The emails came in droves and after the first web cast, people tweeted asking when Kandi would do it again, and thus, “Kandi Koated Nights” was born.
Though Kandi has always been open about sex, she recognizes that as a mother, she has maternal responsibilities to educate her daughter, Riley, 8. She says that she recognizes that kids often get their sex information from friends and classmates, but she wants to have the sex talk with Riley at an early age so that she gets all of the correct information from the right source. Kandi bluntly says, “I don’t want her to go out into the world and experiment and the next thing you know, she’s knocked up with some baby! I’m not going to let her watch Kandi Koated Nights, but I’ll definitely keep it real.”
Kandi does “keep it real,” which led her to a spot in the cast of Bravo’s hit reality TV series, “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.” With her family life, social life, and work life on display for the world, she tells “Rage Monthly” that she approaches it as “just something to do.” “They approached me about doing it and I was like, ‘Okay, that sounds fun.” Kandi continues that, “I’m not going to go out of my way to fake something for them. Hopefully, you can find something in my life interesting enough, and if not, oh well.”
Luckily enough for both Kandi and Bravo, viewers do find her life interesting. From having verbal sparring matches with other cast members, to inventing new words like “boughetto,” Kandi consistently, yet effortlessly entertains the masses. In her first season on “The Real Housewives,” Kandi helped fellow housewife Kim Zolciak achieve short-lived success as a pop star. In Season One, Zolciak received criticism from fellow housewives, media, and viewers for her less than Grammy-worthy vocals, and Kandi saw this as a challenge, though she admits, “With Kim, honestly I didn’t really know what I was getting myself into.”
“I like to see the underdog win. It was my mission to let her get an ‘aha!’ moment,” she says of Kim Zolciak, who, with the generous help of Kandi, achieved her one-hit-wonder dreams with the dance tune, “Tardy for the Party.” In Season Three of the show, viewers saw Kandi give it one more go with Kim and the song, “The Ring Didn’t Mean a Thing,” which she wrote especially for her. At the end of the season, viewers were told that the song’s release was on hold, pending settlements of financial agreements between Kim and Kandi. In a recent interview, Kandi scoffs about the song and says, “Oh, yeah, that ain’t going to be released.”
Despite the financial disagreements over producers’ fees, Kim wasn’t the only housewife that Kandi had disagreements with. Kandi joined “The Real Housewives” cast in Season Two, and came into the show expecting to get along well with Nene Leakes. “She was my favorite one last year, and we really clashed,” Kandi says in the “Los Angeles Times” of her unexpected incongruity with her costar. Bravo aired footage of Nene starting an argument with Kandi at a party, with Kandi reacting in disbelief. In typical Nene fashion, the situation was blown out of proportion and viewers never saw a true resolution, but Kandi claims that what happened off the air was much more scandalous.
After the Housewives had wrapped taping for the season, Kandi was at a radio station doing a promotional interview, when Nene unexpectedly called into the station to talk to Kandi over the air. Kandi took the bait, departing from her usual calm demeanor and allowing her frenemy to provoke her. Of the incident, Kandi says, regretfully, “It became this big blowout on air and I really allowed her to get under my skin.” In the audio, which is now available on YouTube, Nene lashes out at Kandi for something that she claimed to have read in Nene’s book. Voices were raised and the radio host had to intervene multiple times. Kandi admits, “It was really ghetto, for real. I was like wow; I cannot believe she had me acting a complete ass on national radio!” She looks back on Nene’s spiteful call and chuckles, sharing that to this day, every time she visits the same station, they play clips from the interview as a joke.
Kandi’s ability to laugh at herself is one of the many personality traits contributing to her down to earth persona. Journalists rave about her realness and personality, as “Rage Monthly” says, “No one quite represents the Real portion of the series’ title the way Atlanta’s Kandi Burruss does.” “Atlanta Journal Constitution” blogger Rodney Ho notes Kandi as being “Incredibly normal and unaffected by the fame, unlike some others.” Her normality is something she strives to keep, in order to remain likeable. She tells “Shade45” reporter Angela Yee, “There’s people that sell way more records than I have and then years later they don’t even have a pot to piss in. I don’t ever want to be that person.”
It is doubtful that she ever will be “that person,” as she is also a favorite of entertainment industry professionals. Cas Sigers, co-founder of Nina Holiday Entertainment, was surprised to find out how enjoyable it is to work with Kandi. Cas says, I thought she’d be difficult to work with. She proved me wrong.” According to Cas, Kandi is friendly, though also easy to work with and professional. “She knows what she wants. She is very thorough about how she wants to brand to be,” Cas says of working with Kandi on a recent project.
Cas Sigers is currently unable to release information about Nina Holiday Entertainment’s work with Kandi, but if Kandi’s other ventures are any indication, it will be a success. Not only has she achieved success in music and television, but Kandi is also a successful businesswoman. Kandi is co-owner of Smyrna boutique T.A.G.S., which features trendy pieces at affordable prices. She opened the boutique in 2009 with friend Peaches Chin, with the vision to create a store with stylish items for both men and women at prices that are recession friendly. T.A.G.S. is still successful after almost two years, and has added an online store.
With all of her accomplishments, from award winning songwriting and producing, to reality television, what can the world expect next from Kandi Burruss? More success, of course. December 2010 brought the release of Kandi’s latest solo album, “Kandi Koated,” which Kandi consciously wanted to make a “real R&B album,” with heartfelt ballads and a few catchy tunes from fellow producers like Ne-Yo. The soulful album is available in stores and online, and Kandi is currently doing performances at small venues across the South. Fortunately enough for viewers, Kandi will be featured on Season Four of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” where we will inevitably see Kandi pulled into the often less-than-classy antics of these prominent women. Until then, Kandi fans can still see her every Wednesday night on USTREAM.
Finally, though specific details of the project have not yet been released, the sexy yet publically celibate songstress has stated that she is working on developing a line of sex toys. On the Season Three reunion show of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” Kandi said that she would like to have a sex toy line, and that is exactly what she is doing. In a recent broadcast of “KKN,” Kandi talks about a meeting with a sex toy developer in which she learned about prostate stimulators.
No matter what she is stimulating, whether it is one’s ear buds, eyeballs, or prostate, Kandi Burrus is an entertainment gift that keeps on giving. Kandi’s real personality and successful ventures continually bring her success and leave fans everywhere with a sweet tooth for this young entrepreneur.
Sources
Interview between >this blogger< and Kandi Burruss, May 2011
“Rage Monthly”- “Keepin’ It Real with Atlanta Housewife Kandi Burruss” http://www.ragemonthly.com/2011/01/07/keepin-it-real-with-atlanta-housewife-kandi-burruss/
“Atlanta Journal Constitution” entertainment page “Access Atlanta”
http://www.accessatlanta.com/celebrities-tv/whats-in-store-for-166196.html
“Atlanta Journal Constitution” blog
http://blogs.ajc.com/radio-tv-talk/2010/09/23/kandi-burruss-prepping-new-album-new-rhoa-season/
“Los Angeles Times” article “Queen Bee of ‘Atlanta’”
http://articles.latimes.com/2009/oct/22/entertainment/et-nene09
Bossip.com video of “Shade45” interview with Angela Yee
Yahoo Music bio on Xscape
http://new.music.yahoo.com/xscape/biography/
Kandi Burruss’ website, songwriting page and bio page
http://kandionline.com/web/discover-kandi/songwriting/
http://kandionline.com/web/discover-kandi/bio/
Mrsgrapevine.com including YouTube video of radio interview audio
http://mrsgrapevine.com/2009/07/setting-the-record-straight-nene-leakes-kandi-fight-on-radio/
Obviously, from the subject line, you can tell that I am not talking about myself, because I don’t take part in such things.
By involuntary celibacy I am referring to what some call “a slump,” or “dry spell.” An unlucky period of time in which one cannot manage to get laid. By voluntary celibacy, I mean when someone makes the decision not to be sexually active.
As a disclaimer, the rest of this post may be offensive to those who have chosen celibacy or to those who are very religious. Just know that I do not intend to offend and as usual, my blog is written sarcastically and is meant solely for humor.
I have never decided to be celibate and have never had a slump/dry spell. Because, let’s be honest, it is not difficult for young women to get laid. There’s that saying from that movie, “If you build it, they will come.” Well, to relate that to how easy it is to have sex for someone in my demographic, I’d say, “If you open, they will come.” Literally. It’s that easy. If a woman is really determined, she can get sex- guaranteed. I’m not saying she would get railed by Justin Timberlake or any other studly catch like that, but penetration can be achieved. Now, I myself have never needed to get it so badly that I would settle (and don’t think I ever will), but I find it fascinating to learn about the slumps of others. I also find it fascinating to learn about why people decide to be celibate!
A few weeks ago I became friends with a mid-twenties guy who is attractive, very friendly, good sense of humor, employed, and doesn’t live with his parents. He hadn’t gotten laid for 9 months. He told me about a couple instances in which he could have had sex, but he wouldn’t have felt right about it; such as a time when the girl was super drunk, and he backed off because he wouldn’t have felt morally okay about screwing someone so intoxicated. Or another time, when the girl wanted to have sex but she already had a boyfriend and he didn’t want to be “the other man.” Anyhoo, he hadn’t achieved penetration in 9 months and was just about losing it.
On the other hand, I am aware that there are people who take vows of celibacy for their own personal reasons. To me, the thought of not having sex is just horrifying and I don’t understand why anyone would subject themselves to such practices. I have heard that some people do it to cleanse themselves spiritually or some bull like that, but to try and understand, I did an itty bit of Google research and found an interest organization called Celibrate. As in, Celebrating Celibacy. With a cheesily clever name like that, I knew religion was involved (no offense… but come on!). On their website, they have a list of the benefits to celibacy. See below, as I have pasted them and added in my thoughts in red (the color of passion, because you all know I’m not partaking in this celibacy mumbo-jumbo).
From the Celibrate website (in black):
